A man suspected of being the 11th member of a US spy ring allegedly working for Russia has been arrested and charged with acting he is still in the 1980s.
Robert Christopher Metsos, 55, was arrested in his 1980s DeLorean at Cyprus’s Larnaca airport as he tried to leave the island for Budapest, having assumed ‘deep cover’ as an American citizen in order to infiltrate the higher echelons of American policy makers, despite the fact that the Cold War has been over for nearly 20 years.
Jun 30 2010 | Posted in
World News |
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Scientists are pointing to soaring summer temperatures across Britain and Ireland in the past week as evidence of a Global Warming crisis that they say will engulf the planet within weeks.
Temperatures in parts of the UK reached in excess of 30 degrees at the weekend, with the hot weather expected to continue into this week, leading experts to the conclusion that that planet is spiralling towards a collision course with disaster.
Jun 29 2010 | Posted in
News,
Science |
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Germany’s footballers have come under fire after somehow contriving to concede a goal against World Cup minnows England in their 2nd Round match yesterday.
Chancellor Angela Merkel announced that the German team, who won the match 4-1 in Bloemfontein, will be subjected to a full-scale national inquiry after England defender Matthew Upson managed to find the net in the 37th minute.
Jun 28 2010 | Posted in
Sport,
World Cup |
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Prince Charles is set to follow in the footsteps of David Bowie, Jay-Z and Bruce Springsteen after it was announced that he will be playing a one hour set at the Glastonbury Festival’s Pyramid Stage this evening.
The Prince of Wales was mobbed after arriving at 900-acre Worthy Farm, in Pilton, Somerset yesterday, ahead of the gig, with many fans getting to the site early to catch a glimpse of their hero.
Jun 25 2010 | Posted in
Music |
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Doctors have been baffled by a mysterious and very sudden epidemic which seems only to affect people interested in watching England’s final World Cup group game against Slovenia this afternoon.
The disease, labelled ‘Worldcupitis’ by experts, looks set to deprive hundreds of thousands of workers of the opportunity to work while England’s World Cup fate is decided.
Jun 23 2010 | Posted in
News,
Sport,
World Cup |
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ITV HD has been deluged with viewer complaints after it emerged that not only did they not broadcast any goals during Friday’s World Cup match with Algeria, but they also failed to show any examples of an England player demonstrating any sort of discernable talent.
Instead of showing the expected rout of goals in England’s favour, ITV HD’s pictures instead showed players such as Wayne Rooney, Steven Gerrard and Emile Heskey failing to control the ball, or even make simple passes to their team-mates.
The entire nation is in an unreasonably confident mood ahead of the massive anti-climax that will pass for England’s make-or-break World Cup game against Algeria this evening, according to reports.
Following last Saturday’s 1-1 draw with the USA, England need to win tonight’s match to stand a realistic chance of, let’s face it, being eliminated at the knockout stages of the competition next week, or the week after.
Jun 18 2010 | Posted in
Sport,
World Cup |
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Fears for the safety of the North Korean team at the World Cup have intensified after they were patronised to within an inch of their lives following the 2-1 defeat at the hands of Brazil last night.
The match, which saw the North Koreans eventually succumb to defeat after a sustained rearguard action, also saw a stream of unnecessarily trite platitudes delivered, most notably after the North Koreans had scored.
Jun 16 2010 | Posted in
Sport,
World Cup |
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